THESE JOKES ARE FOR THE BIRDS!

Why do seagulls like to live by the sea? 

Because if they lived by the bay, they would be bagels.

What do you get if you cross a duck with a firework? 

A firequacker.

Name a bird of prey.
A cardinal.

My pet owl will soon turn 180. 

He’s not old, he just has a really flexible neck.

I have talent for identifying birds. 
To be fair it's usually pretty easy. 
If it's got a beak and wings it's a bird.

I learned a clever way to find out if a bird is a boy or girl. 
You just feed it some seeds. 
If HE eats the seeds, then it's a boy. 
If SHE eats the seeds, it's a girl. 

And I can do a great bird call.
"OK, how about a crow?"
"Here, crow!" 
 

There was a duck who walked into a store and said, “Got any candy?” 

The storekeeper said, “No, we don’t.” 

The next day, the duck went into the same store and asked the same thing and got the same anwer. The duck kept going back every day for a week and asked the same thing and kept getting the same answer until the store keeper got so angry he said, “if you come in here and ask that again, I will hit you on the head with a hammer!” 

The next day, the duck walks into the store and asks, “Got a hammer?” 

The store keeper says, “No.” 

Then the duck asks--- “Got any candy?”