My friends and I have named our band ‘Duvet’.
It’s a cover band.
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I lost my friend’s audiobook,
and now I’ll never hear the end of it.
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My friend’s bakery burned down last night.
Now his business is toast.
I wasn’t originally going to get a brain transplant,
but then I changed my mind.
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My wife asked me to go get 6 cans of Sprite from the grocery store.
I realized when I got home that I had picked 7 up.
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I have the world’s worst thesaurus.
Not only is it terrible, it’s also terrible.